Friday, May 30, 2008

likes and dislikes

some issues related to... just now, before dinner mum asks me: will you help me with preparing the dinner? I feel resistance and conflict - I this simpel projection? what do I see in her? selfish: someone must help me with this because I fear that otherwise it might possibly be too much for me - in terms of how long it will take.

I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to want to do things quickly and wanting others to help me with this, so that it wouldnt take too long.

I forgive myself that I have allowed msyelf to 'not like' making dinner - and so that the expereince of dislike would not be endless - ask someone to help me so that i can finish quicker

I forgive msyelf that I have allowed msyefl to have dislikes about things, for example cleaning the wall in the kitchen, and wanting help with this so that I wouldnt be bored and frustrated doing it for too long and we could finish quick - so as to put an end to my uncool self-experience

I forgive myself that I have allowed msyelf to - when i have an uncool expereince - want it to go over quick, so that I dont have to face myself in the moment

I forgive myself that I have allowed msyelf to expect from others they will agree with helping me, because I dont like doing something

I forgive myself that i have allowed myself to become ennerved with myself when doing somthing

I forgive myself that i have allowed msyelf to participate in the judgement of 'this is fun' or 'this is not fun'

I forgive myself that I have allowed msyelf to separate myself from fun and want to experience fun by doing something which then generates the experience of fun within me

I forgive msyelf that i have allowed msyelf to have dislikes about things

I forgive myself that i have allowed msyelf to not like myself for who I am

I forgive myself that I have never allowed msyelf to like myself - simply for being me

I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to participate in the belief and thought, that the way I expereince msyelf is dependent on what i am doing, where i am, and with who I am - how late it is, etc...

I forgive msyelf that i have allowed msyefl to think and believe that i need certain things to keep me in a certain agreeable experience of myself

I forgive myself that i have allwoed msyelf to think I need nice colors around me so that I can have an agreeable expereince of myself

I forgive myself that I have allowed msyelf to think I need nice people around me so that I can have an agreeable expereince of myself

I forgive msyelf that I have allowed msyelf to think it must be quiet so that I can have an agreeable experience of myself

I forgive msyelf that I have allowed myself to be disturbed by loud noises

I forgive myself that I have allowed msyelf to make my selfexperience dependent on where I am: at home or at work or in the parc

I forgive myself that I have allowed msyelf to change modes and access programs as soon as I enter the restaurant workfloor

I forgive myself that I have allowed msyelf to fear the expereince of myself at work - instead of realizing: i am allways justy experiencing me, no matter where i am or what I am doing

I forgive msyelf that I have allowed msyelf to think I need a swimmingpool in order to have an agreeable expreince of myself

I forgive msyelf that I ahve allowed msyelf to think I need to be able to ride bike - so as to have an agreeable experience of myself

I forgive myself that I have allowed msyelf to consider the possibility of anyone reading these words and start becoming 'reflexive' about which word I should wtrite next and also about if this self forgiveness is starting to get random

I forgive msyelf that I have allowed msyelf to experience myself differently at work and at home

I forgive myself that i have allowed myself to experience myself diferently when I am inside or outside

I forgive myself that I ahve allowed msyelf to experience myself differently wheter I am standing or sitting

I forgive msyelf that I have allowed msyelf to experience myself differently wheter I walk forwards or backwards

I forgive msyelf that I have allowed msyelf to experienc emyself differently depending on the clothes I wear

I forgive msyelf that i have allowed msyelf to expereince msyelf differently depending on the shoes I wear: my brown shoes or my sandals or my All stars, etc

I forgive msyelf that I have allowed msyelf to expereince myself differently wheter it is night or day

I forgive msyelf that I ahve allowed msyefl to experience myself differently wheter it is raining or not

I forgive msyelf that I have allowed msyelf to expereince myself differently when I am alone or when I am around people

I forgive myself that I ahve allowed msyelf to experience myself differently when I am with my mother or with my father

I forgive msyelf that i ahvea llwoed msyefl to expereince msyelf differently when i am with eyes open or eyes closed

I forgive myself that I ahve allowe myself to expereince mysezlf differently when i am 'sleeping' or 'awake'

I forgive msyelf that I ahve allowed msyelf to experience myself differentyly wheter I have long hair or short hair

I forgive msyelf that I ahvea llowe dmsyelf to expereince myself differently before and afyter i go to swimmingpool

I forgive msyelf that I have allowed msyelf to expereince msyelf differently wheter I am in the whirlpool or outside it

I forgive msyelf that I ahve allowed msyelf to expereince myself differently wheter i am in a sauna or not

I forgive myself that I ahve allowed msyelf to expereince msyelf differently while I am in a room or when I climb the stairs

I forgive msyelf that i ahve allowed msyelf to expereince msyelf differently when I masturbate or not

I forgive msyelf that I ahve allwoed msyelf to expereince msyelf differently when I look at porn or not

I forgive msyelf that I have allwoed msyelf to expereince msyelf differently when I am sitting in a coutch and watching a movie - or not

I forgive msyelf that I have allowed msyelf to expereince msyelf differently when I see a person is on the street

I forgive msyelf that I havea allowed msyelf to have a different experteince of msyelf when maite enters the room

I forgive msyeklf that I ahve allwoed msyezlf to habe a different expereince of msyelf when leila is with me

I forgive msyelf that Ihave allowed msyeflt o have a different experince msyelf wheter i am on chat or not

I forgive msyelf that I ahvea llwoed msyelf to have a different experience of myself wheter dimensions enter chat or not

I forgive msyelf that I ahve allowed msyelf to have a different experience of msyelf while I am eating or not eating

I forgive msyelf that i ahve allowe dmsyelf to have a different experience of msyelf wheter i eat bread or warm dinner

I forgive msyelf that I have allowed msyelf to experience msyelf differently when my father is around

I forgive msyelf that I ahvea llwoed msyelf to experience msyelf differently when C. is there at work or not

I forgive msyelf that I have allowed msyeft to expereince msyelf differently when i see a girl

I forgive myself that I have allowed msyeflt o expereince msyelf differently when I see a child

I forgive msyelf that I have allowed msyeflt o expereince msyelf differently when I see a man

I forgive msyelf that I ahvea llowed to experince myself differently when I see myself in the mirror

I forgive msyelf that I have allowe dmsyelf to expereicne myself differently when i see a very old person

I forgive msyelf that I ahve allwoe dmsyelf to have a different experince of msyelf wheter i see or am with an old man or an old woman or none of both

I forgive msyelf that I have allwoe dmsyelf to experience myself differently when a car come driving by

I forgive msyelf that I ahve allwoed msyefl to expereince myself differently wheter there are birds singing in the trees or not

I forgive myself that I have allowed msyelf to expereince msyelf differently wheter I stand still or wheter i walk

I forgive msyelf that I have allowed myself to experience myself differently wheter i have a body or not ;)

I forgive myself that I Have allowed myself to expereince myself differently wheter someone is talking to me or wheter the person is silent

I forgive msyelf that I have allowed myself to experienc emyself differe,ntly wheter i am writing or not

I forgive myself that I havea llowed msyefl to expereince msyelf differently wheter i am smoking or not

I forgive msyelf that I have allwoe dmsyelf to expereinc emyself differentley wheter i am talking or not

I forgive msyelf that I have allowed msyelf to experience msyelf differently wheter I am with someone in the room or alone

I forgive msyelf that i ahve allwoed msyelf to experienc emyself differently when i am walkin amongst a crowd of people

I forgive msyelf that I have allwoed msyelf to expereince msyelf differently wheter I am at home or in the city

I forgive msyelf that io have allwoe dmsyuel to experienc emyself differently wheter I have to work on a particular day or not

to be continued...

No comments: