Saturday, June 21, 2008

Attention

i forgive msyelf that i have allwoed msyelf tod efine attention as something I must RECEIVE from another

I forgive msyelf that i have allowed msyelf to define attention as someone else GIVING me attention

I forgive msyelf that i have allwoed msyelf to define attention in separation of myself - defined accodring to things and people in and of this world - instead of recognizing attention as myself - I AM self-attention

I forgive msyelf that I have allowed msyefl to define attention as something i must DESERVE to RECEIVE from other beings - meaning: I must perform something or accomplish something in order to be worthy of attention

I forgive msyelf that i have allwoed msyefl to wanna receive attention by engaging in attentionseeking behaviour

I forgive msyelf that I have allwoed msyefl to be an attentionseeker

I forgive msyelf that I have allwoed msyelf to believe I must be SEEN in order for my application- WHO I AM - to be validated, to be valid

I forgive msyelf that I have allwoed msyelf to define attention as something I must 'work for'

I forgive msyelf that i ahve allwoed msyefl to define attention as soemthing I must do my best to be worthy to receive it in separation from me

I forgive msyelf that i ahve allowed msyelf tod efine attention as being seen by another

I forgive msyelf that i ahvea llowed msyelf to define attention according to this world - as someone looking at my direction

I forgive msyelf that I have allowed msyefl to define attention as something I CANNOT GIVE MYSELF

I forgive msyelf that I have anot allowed msyelf to LIVE myself as self-attention as me in every moment of breath

I forgive msyelf that i have allwoed msyefl to think and believe that i order to receive attention I must be SEEN and therefore I must be a PICTURE of sorts

I forgive msyelf that I have allwoed msyefl to define attention as being seen as a picture

I forgive msyelf that i have allwoed msyelf to when i enjoy myself hope that somebody sees this, notices this and enjoys this too - as a validation of my application

I forgive msyelf that I have allwoed msyelf to become a picture so that I am ABLE to RECEIVE attention

I forgive msyelf that I have allwoed msyefl to fear death, because then everybody will forget about me - as my mind-definition and personality - and I will recveive no more attention

I forgive msyelf that i have allwoe dmsyelf to fear losing attention through death - instead of realizing me as self-attention - I have attention for me as all as equal as one as me as life

I forgive mysemlf that i have allwoed msyelf to fear LIVING myself as one and equal with all as life - because of fear I will lose the 'personal attention' - this is the death of the mind

I forgive msyelf that i have allwoed msyefl to fear the death of the mind - because I fear to lose attention through being SEEN

I forgive msyelf that i ahve allwoed msyelf to indulge in the ridiculous belief that i can somehow LOSE attention - as if it were something seperate from WHO I AM already

I accept and acnkowledge and recognize myself as self-attention: the attention I have FOR ME - as all as equal as one as me

I forgive myself that I have allwoed msyelf to define attention as someone hearing me and listening to me attentively

I forgive msyelf that I have allowed myself to define attention as being heard and listened to attentively by another seperate from me

I forgive msyelf that i have allowed msyefl to define attention as soemone paying attention to my words

I forgive msyelf that i have allowed msyeflt o define attention as someone spending time with me and hearing me only and not another

I forgive msyelf that I have allowed myself to define attention as someone spending time (typo: tie with me) with me and only seeing me and hearing me

I forgive msyelf that I have allwoed msyefl to need another to spend time with me and only see and hear ME and no one else

I forgive msyelf that I have allowed msyelf to define attention as being with a being who only will see and hear ME and no one else

I forgive myself that I have allwoed myself tod efine attention as being with my mother and she only seeing me and hearing ME and no one else, paying attention to everything I say, to everything I do

I forgive msyelf that I have allwoed msyelft od efine attention as being cared for by another who will only see me and hear ME and no one else

I forgive msyelf that i ahve allowed msyelf to define attention as imagining msyelf standing on a stage giving a rock concert - so that all only see and hear ME and no one else

I forgive msyelf that I have allwoed msyelf to define ttention as imaging myself standing on a stage playing electric guitar so that the imagined audience only sees me and hears ME and no one else

I forgive msyelf that I ahve allwoed msyefl to define attention as imagining myself to have written a novel, so that all my friedns would only see me and talk about me and give me their attention

I forgive msyelf that i have allowed msyelf to define attention as someone reading a story I wrote, reading it with much care and attention

I forgive msyelf that I have allowed msyelf to define attention as imagining myself that people read my blog attentively and with care

I forgive msyelf that i have allwoed msyefl to define attention as being good at something and therefore deserving other people their attention

I forgive msyelf that i have allowed msyelf to define attention as imaging myself to be famous after I have published my first novel in the future

I forgive msyelf that I have allowed msyefl to define attention as publishing my first novel before I am 19 of age because then i will be the youngest writer in belgium - and will receive attention because of this

I forgive msyelf that I have allwoed msyelf tod efien attention as an imagined point in the future where I will be recognized as an excellent writer with outstanding writing skills

I forgive msyelf that I have allowed msyefl to define attention as receiving 'positive comments' on my writings

I forgive myself that I have allowed msyefl to define attention as receiving feedback on what I write from someone

I am self-attention and self-love as me

I have attention for me

I forgive msyelf that i ahve anever allowed msyelf to realize I was seeking for me, for me to be HERE as self-attention

I forgive msyelf taht i aheva llwoed myself to expect from another to show me attention

I forgive msyelf that I have allwoed myself to 'give other people' attention from the starting point of them needing it in separation just as I did

I forgive msyelf that I have not allowed msyelf to realize myself as self-attention

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